Various Lies

Thursday, June 18, 2009

MailBots, Apnea & Hit Men...

The following is an email I wrote a friend of mine just now (edited slightly, obviously). I realised it also made a nice, random blog up date. But here's the issue: I was using my Gmail account. Google let you have this vast, free account, but they advertise on your email page, right? No probs. But, they are obviously "reading" your email too. My friend is an academic at a large university in the SE of the US and reading one her emails the other day I noticed adverts for Large Univ entrance exams "Large Uni: pass your MCATs!" etc.

Mail content specific advertising. Now, my friend is a woman, or "female" as Americans insist on saying, so sometimes our chats get a bit raunchy, more for shits and giggles than anything else (he says, nudge nudge wink wink.) I'm not sure I'm comfortable having them read, y'know! I know that email is as secure as a postcard sent through regular mail, but at least the Royal Mail, or the USPS don't tailor the junk mail you recieve to the contents of your outgoing letters!

I was writting this update, and noticed the adverts on the sidebar were already content specific. So, the Google mailbots are scanning As I Type? What The Everliving Fuck? This feels like a step too far in the invasion of my privacy, and I'm aware of the obvious cognitive dissonance in that statement.

Anyway. What to do? What to do? Double check I'm being scanned as I type (I my be wrong, I'll be the first to admit I jump to conclusions too readily. Some skeptic, huh?). Then...Plan C!

(Plan B, of course, is to figure out what Plan C is, so I can implement it).

Anyway, that's the Mailbot part of this post, here's the rest....

*************

I went to bed at 10. It was great! I've trained Muay Thai everyight this week, and haven't had any alcohol. So, I was sleepy and very ready to crash after watching the UK win AGAIN in the Ultimate Fighter. Except I've developed this weird behaviour in the last few weeks... I'll be lying in bed, dozing and sleepy, only my mind is spinning super fast. I start dreaming, kind of, as my brain is trying to parse all the information spinning in there and so the "dreams" can be quite surreal. Suddenly, as I fall asleep I twich, often violently, back awake. As if my body and hindbrain want to sleep, but my cortex needs to stay awake and process data; so in a last ditch effort to keep the CPU running it sends a command to all my muscles at once.

Over and over again.

It's so strange. I wondered if it was some form of sleep apnea and I was jerking awake as my breathing slowed too far, but I don't think so. I need to figure this out and find a way to shut my thoughts down abit. Too much on my mind, and too much new information to process every day. Any advice is most welcome...

And on that note, looks like my job is getting better and stuff, finally. My boss talked to her boss, (the Vice Chancellor), who is excited about me wanting to move over to the Academic Affairs side of the business. Wanta me on board because she's seen how I cleaned up my current Unit. This would make me a deputy of some sort I guess. Full on Senior Attack Dog position >:) Hit man in the upper eschelons of power!

And hopefully more $$$. please god more $$$. I did my finances the other day. After bills are paid and factoring $300/mo for lunches & drinks ($10/day!) I have something like $400/mo to live on :( not good. How exactly does one pay down vast amounts of credit card debt or save for emergencies/car repairs/vacations on a couple of hundred bucks/onth? Am I being cheap? Is that normal?

7 comments:

chall said...

hm, for the first time in my life I pay less than 50% of my pay check in rent&utility bills...

I think $400 sounds like mine, it depends on what you mean with bills though... not credit card bills?!

The gmail sounds very creepy. I haven't used my account in ages.... I hope it all gets better!

tideliar said...

I get some help but not enough. I'm working on that angle of things, but life is $$$ tight all round right now.

The bean-mom said...

I never noticed the Google mail spies before. I do have a gmail account, but rarely use it. That is totally freaky. Thanks for adding to my Google paranoia... (as I use more and more of their products...)

Good to hear you seem to moving up at your job (with hopefully increases in pay to match!) That jerking-out-of-sleep thing sounds mighty annoying

tideliar said...

Hey Bean-mom. The jerking awake thing is rather annoying. I went to bed early again last night, finally fell asleep around 1 and feel like I haven't slept in days! I might as well start drinking again. At least if I felt this bad, I'd had a good time to blame it on!

microbiologist xx said...

I don't think the jerking awake is sleep apnea. Apnea is cause by obstruction of the airway during sleep, which obviously deprives the body of oxygen. This causes the person to gasp for air during the night and wakes them from sleep, although the person typically has not recollection of the event. Although I hate having insomnia, it seems a helluva lot better (and less dangerous) than sleep apnea.
Having said that, I must agree that the jerking awake is awful, especially when accompanied by the sensation of falling. Of course this usually gets the adrenalin pumping, making it even more difficult to fall back asleep.
Good luck with the potential upgrade in job and money. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

Monado said...

Well, to start with, one packs a lunch and cuts that expense down to $100 a month for drinks. If you're willing to eat sandwiches you can make five on Sunday night and freeze four of them. Taken out of the freezer in the morning, they thaw by noon. On the other hand, if there's a microwave oven at work you can take leftovers.

The jerking when you fall asleep is called a "myoclonic jerk." There doesn't seem to be any reason for them. Mine are usually accompanied by a brief but vivid dream of falling. "Myo" generally means "muscle" so I suspect this just means "muscle storm" or some such. I dislike the feeling but I get them only once in a while. If they interfere with sleep, see your doctor. There's a link here: MedHelp Neurology expert forum: myoclonic jerks.

Hope this helps....

tideliar said...

Thanks for stopping by Monado. You're right about cooking your own food. I need to just get my ass into gear and *do it*. It gets so hot here in the summer that going out for lunch i a real chore (>100F every day). So a packed lunch is better idea.

Thanks for the info too. Now you've mentioned it the term is familiar to me. I shall go investigate like a good little scientist.